“After John McCain made a political ad that featured Paris Hilton… she fired back with her own political ad calling Sen. McCain a wrinkly, white-haired guy, and talked about her energy policy, which until this point, has been vodka.” — Jimmy Kimmel on Paris Hilton’s retaliating political ad on John McCain … Continue reading…Jimmy Kimmel On Paris Hilton’s Retaliating Political Ad On John McCain
“John Edwards admitted Friday to having an adulterous affair on the campaign trail, and he was immediately replaced as a speaker at the Democratic convention by Bill Clinton. The lesson is clear. You cannot act like that when everybody likes your wife.” — Argus Hamilton on John Edwards admitting to adultery … Continue reading…Argus Hamilton On John Edwards Admitting To Adultery
“The audience will understand that it’s in the national interest.” — Chen Qigang, chief music director of the Beijing Olympics opening ceremony, on why the Chinese government had one girl sing while a cuter girl lip-synched for the international audience … Continue reading…Chen Qigang On The Beijing Olympics Lip-Synching
“The government of China guaranteed that the Beijing Olympics will be safe. They know the Olympics will be safe because they’ve already written the next three weeks of news stories.” — Conan O’Brien on China’s assurances of a safe 2008 Summer Olympics … Continue reading…Conan O’Brien On China’s Assurances Of A Safe 2008 Summer Olympics
“The Olympics are right around the corner. China has announced that protesters will be allowed to assemble in designated ‘protest areas.’ Or as they’re commonly called in China, jail.” — Conan O’Brien on China’s tough police stance at the 2008 Summer Olympics … Continue reading…Conan O’Brien On China’s Tough Police Stance At The 2008 Summer Olympics