“Swine flu is bad in Mexico. They’re not allowing anyone to go to the soccer games. They’re playing them, just no fans are in the stands. Just like soccer here in the United States.” — David Letterman on swine flu and Mexico … Continue reading…David Letterman On Swine Flu And Mexico
“Who Wants To Be A Millionaire is returning to prime-time. Due to the recession, it’s been renamed ‘Who Wants Five Bucks And A Taco.'” — Craig Ferguson on the return of i>Who Wants To Be A Millionaire … Continue reading…Craig Ferguson On The Return Of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
“A doctor in England claims that he has impregnated four women with human clones. I think we should go back to the old-fashioned way of having babies — eight at a time.” — Craig Ferguson on English Doctor’s human cloning claim … Continue reading…Craig Ferguson On English Doctor’s Human Cloning Claim
“Actress Mia Farrow has announced she’s going on a hunger strike to show solidarity with the people of Darfur. Why is it always skinny people who go on hunger strikes? Why can’t we get Michael Moore to go on a hunger strike?” — Jay Leno on Mia Farrow’s hunger strike for Darfur … Continue reading…Jay Leno On Mia Farrow’s Hunger Strike For Darfur
“President Obama gave a speech on the economy, and once again he promised Americans change. Specifically pennies… nickels… dimes…” — Jimmy Fallon on Barack Obama’s recent speech on the state of the economy … Continue reading…Jimmy Fallon On Barack Obama’s Recent Speech On The State Of The Economy