“Capt. Richard Phillips got offers from Hollywood studios for the film rights to his heroic story Tuesday. How much he gets depends on his past. If he’s led an upright life, he could get millions, but if he has skeletons in his closet, the sky’s the limit.” — Argus Hamilton on Capt. Richard Phillips … Continue reading…Argus Hamilton On Capt. Richard Phillips
“The president may have a nominee for the Supreme Court by the end of the week. Does it bother anybody that it took him 10 times longer to pick a dog?” — Craig Ferguson on Barack Obama’s Supreme Court Justice nominee … Continue reading…Craig Ferguson On Barack Obama’s Supreme Court Justice Nominee
“Swine flu is bad in Mexico. They’re not allowing anyone to go to the soccer games. They’re playing them, just no fans are in the stands. Just like soccer here in the United States.” — David Letterman on swine flu and Mexico … Continue reading…David Letterman On Swine Flu And Mexico
“Who Wants To Be A Millionaire is returning to prime-time. Due to the recession, it’s been renamed ‘Who Wants Five Bucks And A Taco.'” — Craig Ferguson on the return of i>Who Wants To Be A Millionaire … Continue reading…Craig Ferguson On The Return Of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire
“A doctor in England claims that he has impregnated four women with human clones. I think we should go back to the old-fashioned way of having babies — eight at a time.” — Craig Ferguson on English Doctor’s human cloning claim … Continue reading…Craig Ferguson On English Doctor’s Human Cloning Claim